This past Saturday I attended my 25th high school reunion.
As someone who was especially quiet and shy and lacking in confidence, I canât say I particularly enjoyed my high school experience. But the previous three reunions had been really lovely. Actually, it was kinda shocking how nice everyone had become.
And my 20th one, which had initially been scheduled in May 2020 - but for obvious reasons was postponed by a few years and was sparsely attended as a result - I was pumped to attend this one.
I had this vision of how the night would go:
No longer that shy, awkward kid, Iâd feel confident talking to everyone, from the people I actually hung out with to the popular kids who had intimidated me.
Iâd have lengthy conversations with my friends who Iâd last touch with and hadnât seen since our 10th reunion, catching one another up on our lives as parents and professionals.
And while I did have some really great conversations and reconnected with a few friendsâŠ.itâs not how the night went.
After some perfunctory hugs from some of the people I was most looking forward to seeing, I barely talked to them again.
I had the same conversation over and over again about living up in Boston and having two kids.
And as the night wore on, I felt more and more like my shy, awkward self, hurt that my childhood best friend who I hadnât seen in three years left before saying goodbye and confused by the seeming disinterest of the people I was most looking forward to catching up with.
Quite honestly, I was crushed. I barely made it out of the parking lot before the tears began to fall.
The next morning, I was still in a funk, replaying every interaction and wondering why my former friends barely acknowledged me. That night, as I said goodnight to my 11-year-old, she gave me the biggest, most comforting hug, reading my emotions without me saying a word.
It wasnât until the next day that I really forced myself to think about the evening - and (for full disclosure) how I could use this story for todayâs newsletter because apparently thatâs how I operate now đ
- that I realized:
As much as it stings, my high school friends donât owe me anything. They donât owe me their interest or attention.
While from my perspective theyâve made no effort, the truth is⊠neither have I.
And if Iâm gonna be really truthfully with myself, as much as I wanted to catch up and hear about their lives in the past 15 years, I went into that night thinking more about telling my story.
As business owners, we have to care not just about telling our stories, but about deepening relationships.
That happens not by showing up when the mood strikes, or we when weâre ready to launch something, or we have space in our rosters, but by showing up consistently.
As Kyle Adams at Kit wrote in a LinkedIn post yesterday:
Youâre not just sending emails.
Youâre shaping an experience.
And while yes, thatâs in your name and words showing up in your subscribersâ inboxes, Reader, thatâs also by having an email that reflects your professionalism and values, one that shapes that experience so that itâs as beneficial for you the business owner and the people on the receiving end.
When you show up consistently in your subscribersâ inboxes with valuable, relevant emails, youâre not just maintaining a list, youâre nurturing relationships that can turn into inquiries, bookings, and long-term clients.
Those are exactly the experiences I craft for my clients.
If youâre interested in what this could look like for your business, check out my services guide or book a call to discuss whatâs possible for your email setup.
Take it one step at a time,
âBevââ
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As a solo business owner, I strive to incorporate my values of environmentalism and anti-racism and to build an inclusive and equitable business. I believe Black Lives Matter and I stand for LGBTQIA+ rights, including the rights of Transgender and Intersex people.
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600 1st Ave, Ste 330 PMB 92768, Seattle, WA 98104-2246